Star Trek: Worthy of the Iron Mantle?

On May 2nd, 2008, Jon Favreau’s Iron Man was unleashed upon the world and rocked its way to a $102 million opening weekend and a $318 million gross. Iron Man had more than a few things going for it… being a Marvel Studios picture… Jon Favreau’s honest love of the material… the mix of practical and digital effects… and, of course, Robert Downey Jr. However, the thing that really made it a hit was the simple fact that it was downright fun and wildly entertaining.

Just over a year later, I found myself once again leaving a movie theatre after seeing a downright fun, wildly entertaining movie. I wish I could say I was talking about X-Men Origins: Wolverine, but we all know that is not the case and I must be referring to J.J. Abrams’ Star Trek.

With its 96% approval rating at Rotten Tomatoes, I’m obviously not the only one who thought the new Star Trek was a hoot. Beyond the previously established level of fun and entertainment, Star Trek was primarily exciting with just the right amount of humour, sex appeal and emotional resonance to balance things out.

It should be pointed out that I am no Trekkie and didn’t have any baggage to deal with going in. I watched the original TV series a bit as a kid and recognized all the characters and knew just enough to appreciate the work Abrams, the writers and the cast and crew put into the movie. However, I didn’t know so much as to be rendered incapable of enjoying it for what it was… and certainly not so much that the movie made me “supremely irate” like it did to a certain unnamed friend (Stephanie).

Now that all the broad ideas and fine print are out of the way, Pop Culture A.D.D. is proud to present the Top-10 Reasons Why Star Trek Was Pretty Fuckin’ Cool:

10. It was like watching a shinier version of the original Star Wars.


From the similarities between young Kirk and young Luke (in his staring out at the twin suns days) to the awards ceremony at the end, Star Trek borrowed more than a few beats from the original Star Wars, but that is no bad thing. Star Trek seemed a bit clichéd at times, but in the very best, most awesome way possible.

9. Zoe Saldana.

As Nyota Uhura, actress Zoe Saldana brought more than her fair share of eye candy to the screen. No doubt Trekkies around the world will be debating the relative merits of Saldana versus original Uhura, actress Nichelle Nichols, for years to come. Sadly, the conversations will be about her effectiveness as a communications officer.

8. “Fire everything!”

Basically, this is just to give props to actor Eric Bana’s performance as the big, bad Nero. Nero’s motivations and Bana’s bad-assery combined to make a villain worthy of the new crew’s maiden voyage.

7. Spock Prime.

The presence of Leonard Nimoy was equal parts comforting and cool. Without going so far as to spoil the story or the plot elements that necessitate his presence, I will say I think the writers did a solid job re-booting the franchise while paying homage to everything that had happened beforehand.

6. Winona Ryder.

Just like seeing Leonard Nimoy brought me back to my childhood, seeing Winona Ryder (as Spock’s human mother) brought me back to my adolescence. It’s not exactly a return to the glory days of Reality Bites and Edward Scissorhands, but she’s always welcome on screen if you ask me.

5. The U.S.S. Enterprise as a fetish object.

Seriously, the way the U.S.S. Enterprise was revealed and the way it was shot was obviously designed to give Trekkies geek-gasms. Chris Pine or Zoe Saldana could have done a nude scene and it wouldn’t have been shot with as much laughable reverence and style as the U.S.S. Enterprise.

4. John Cho putting down the bong and picking up the sword.

I’ve got nothing but love for Harold & Kumar Go To White Castle. I still laugh about laughing so hard I woke up my wife the first time I saw the cheetah scene. That being said, it was totally cool to see John Cho kick a little Romulan ass.

3. The time machine that brought DeForest Kelley back.

I see that IMDB lists actor Karl Urban as playing the young Dr. Leonard “Bones” McCoy, but I’m pretty positive somebody invented a time machine and went back and got DeForest Kelley when he was in his 30s and forced him into being in the new Star Trek by pulling the old Marty McFly fry-your-brains-with-a-Walkman routine.

2. Kirk & Spock.

The young Spock was more emotional and more sexual than I imagined him, but given the circumstances, it totally works. The young Spock was absolutely bang on… and not by mimicking the appearance or mannerisms of William Shatner, but by being fearless, cocksure, funny and charismatic. Welcome to movie stardom, Chris Pine and Zachary Quinto; just try to stay away from the hookers and blow. (Also, when Kirk and Spock became friends at the end of the movie, I could hear Cartman singing “You guys are my best friends” in my head.)

1. BOOM & silence.

“BOOM” is the theatre-shaking sound of the U.S.S. Enterprise going to warp speed and let me tell you, it was fucking awesome. I almost laughed out loud the first time it happened. Silence is the sound you’ll hear if you ever have the misfortune of getting sucked out into the vacuum of space. Both sounds effects helped make Star Trek as downright fun and wildly entertaining as it was.

Thanks, J.J. Abrams. Your Star Trek was awesome. Now go for a swim in your money, ala Scrooge McDuck.